I don’t mean for this to be like a rambly “poor-me” post or whatever but that’s probably how it will end up. It’s just kind of how I’m feeling right now. I guess it’s kind of how I’ve been feeling for a while.
I think since our friends moved to Singapore I’ve pretty much quit trying to connect with anyone else. I was never all that great at going out of my way to be friendly with people before they left but since then, it’s certainly gotten worse. It just doesn’t seem worth it anymore. I know that’s a terrible thing to say. We’ve got lots of acquaintances and even some people we would consider friends. I’ve got a couple of good friends and so does Phillip but we don’t really have any couples that we hang out with anymore. And I feel pretty sad about it a lot. We’re not really in a small group at church anymore. Partly because of child care issues and partly because I think if I walk into that small group without seeing the Stunzs there, I might just fall apart. I just feel like we’ve gotten ourselves pretty isolated. And Phillip may not appreciate me writing this stuff but just know that this is coming from me, not him. He probably doesn’t even feel this way. So, there you have it. In a nutshell I feel pretty lonely lately. And I realize to some that’s a pretty pathetic and weak thing to say but it’s the truth. It’s no one’s fault but my own. I have done this to myself and I don’t know how to fix it or even if it can be fixed. Maybe lots of other people feel the same way I do but they’re just better at playing games. I don’t guess I play very well with others.