Jenny Hintze

"We are the music makers and we are the dreamers of dreams." – Willy Wonka

Let the chips fall where they may. October 26, 2010

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I have no idea from one week to the next, one month to the next, one day to the next how much money I will bring in. No idea. I can guess. I can plot trends. I can assume. I can pray. But really I have no idea. I may expect nothing and randomly bring in $1000 or more in a couple of days. It’s very nice when that happens, but the opposite often happens too and that’s certainly not as cool.


I no longer get my hopes up when someone says they’re going to call me for pictures. I no longer take it seriously when someone says they’ll be getting that order to me tomorrow. I no longer get giddy when someone tells me I am the perfect person for their wedding…but they just need to check with their fiance first. I just smile, nod, and hope for the best.


Sometimes I think it might be nice to go to a job, do the job, come home, and know that I’ll be getting a predictable paycheck on a predictable day. It would certainly be easier to plan for things. But for the most part I just still can’t believe that I actually get paid to photograph people. I’m able to stay home with my children. I’m able to make my own schedule and be my own boss. I’m able to take vacation whenever I want to. I can work in my pajamas.


I’m having a “let the chips fall where they may” kind of day…week…month. There are an abundance of potentially great opportunities for me right now. Potentially great or potentially nothing. Let the chips fall where they may. Because no matter which way they fall I’ll continue to do what I love to do. I’ll continue to shake my head in disbelief that I get to do it at all. I’ll continue to learn, grow, hone my craft. I’ll never quit doing this as long as God allows me to do it.


Tonight I’m going to bed with several things still up in the air. They’ll either be carried off in the wind or fall in my lap. I have no way of knowing what tomorrow might bring. And that’s more exciting than a predictable paycheck any day.

 

Not Me Monday! October 25, 2010

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Oh how long has it been since I’ve purged my many failures to you lovely people? Too long…much too long. So, let’s get on with it, shall we?



I did NOT wash Jackson’s ipod touch. But even if I had, it would have been his fault, not mine. It’s not my job to check my kids’ pockets before I wash clothes. Oh wait…it is my job? Well, crap! Now you tell me. Anyway, it still works somehow. Go Apple!


I also did not at a wedding this weekend make a young lady feel awkward by asking her if I could take a picture of her haircut with my iphone to show my hairdresser only to realize that I took a video instead and then I didn’t make her feel even more awkward by dragging out the whole experience and asking her if I could try again. Nope, not me! I don’t get a kick out of putting people in awkward situations.


I also did NOT ask a priest if my husband was bothering him. Nor did I take a candid shot of that same priest eating and then say…”I got you!” No…again with the making people uncomfortable thing. I don’t do that. And…I’m not that dorky.


Moving on…


My toes don’t look like this.



Gross, right? Andrea, does that color look familiar?


And I didn’t tell the church organist that the bride had just previously been dipping snuff because why would I do that?! Seriously. But if I had, she would have known I was only joking…I think so anyway. One can’t be too sure about those kinds of things.


And I’m NOT currently eating a cupcake or ten while I stay up way too late editing, blogging, and planning this week of homeschool.


Nope, not me!

 

Thinking about a block party October 15, 2010

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We moved to this house in June and we have met about three of our neighbors. Nobody has really gone out of their way to get to know us, but we haven’t really gone out of our way to get to know any of them either. I was thinking it might be fun to send out invites to every family in our horseshoe street and invite them over for burgers some evening. But that’s kind of a scary thing to do. Letting a bunch of complete strangers in your home is just not something that most people do on purpose. Anyway, I was just talking to Jackson about it to get his take on the idea. He said that he doesn’t like the idea of a bunch of 93 year olds all cuddled up in his bed. And as ridiculous and hilarious as that sounds, my fears of inviting psychopaths into my house who might secretly go through my panty drawer is probably equally ridiculous. So, maybe we’ll do it. It could be fun. And if a bunch of elderly people do fall asleep all cuddled up somewhere together I’ll be sure to take a picture.

 

Oh Mikey. October 13, 2010

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Alien Art

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I am behind on blogging. A couple of weeks or so ago..?? some friends came over to help us make space alien robots out of boxes. And here is the result of all that. Hannah, Maddie, I’m SO GLAD that you came over to help us make such awesome space aliens!!! We couldn’t have done it without you!












 

Just beachy October 12, 2010

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On Saturday Mikey wanted to go to the beach. So that’s just what we did.














 

Why homeschool? October 7, 2010

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Sometimes I feel the need to defend why we homeschool. I don’t know why exactly, just insecure I guess. I don’t really think it needs defending, but I guess I think that maybe most people feel the way I felt before I was a mom. I didn’t understand why anybody would homeschool. I thought it was absolutely crazy. I still think it’s a little crazy. The public school system wants to take my kids FOR FREE Monday-Friday for 8 hours, 9 months out of the year. FOR FREE!!! And I have decided to keep my kid home and teach him myself and give up hours of free time every day. Why? Why would I do that?


There are so many positive reasons to homeschool, but I guess if I could narrow it down to just one reason, I would say it is to protect my child’s worth. Or rather to protect my child’s feeling of worth. So much of school is worrying about how others feel about you.


“What do other kids see when they look at me? Am I cool enough? Do I have the right clothes? Do I listen to the right music? Is my house big enough? Am I worthy? Am I worthy of your approval? Like me. Please just like me. What can I do to make you like me?”


I think all of us can identify with this stuff. Some of us are scarred well into adulthood because of these questions. We carry them into adulthood and they continue to permeate every aspect of our lives. We carry insecurities. We carry shame from things we did to be accepted and loved. And I understand that some feel this is just a necessary rite of passage to adulthood. Many people argue that children who are homeschooled aren’t being “socialized” whatever that means. Any public school teacher can tell you that kids aren’t really allowed to socialize all that much in school anyway and much of the socialization isn’t even positive. Some feel that if we don’t sort through this as a child we won’t know our place in society or something along those lines.


But is it really necessary? Is it really beneficial? Can you honestly look back at some of your worst memories of elementary school, middle, or high school and say that those experiences made you a better person? Did feeling inadequate because of your weight or your Pro-Wings or your acne really prepare you for college? Did having to look perfect everyday help you become a better mom? Did going to all those parties really make you a more committed employee? Did dating her really make you a better husband?


I think that right now my child needs to find his self worth from people who adore him. He needs to be built up. He needs the foundation of knowing that he is good. He needs to know that God created him and that God doesn’t make mistakes. He needs a firm grasp of these things so that he doesn’t believe the lies that the world will tell him. He doesn’t need his education clouded by wondering what the kid in the next desk over thinks about him.


Do I think homeshooling is best for every kid or every family? No, I definitely don’t. Every kid is different and every parent is different. Some kids take everything that others say to heart, while other kids are able to take it with a grain of salt. Some parents are able to provide a safe at home learning environment, while others aren’t. Some parents are very involved with their child’s education even if they are in public school, while other parents turn a blind eye and trust that the school system is doing a fine job without their help.


I know myself well enough to know that if I truly want to be involved in Jackson’s education, then I need to teach him myself. I also know my own tendencies toward anger, and I know that I have to keep that in check to be able to provide a safe environment for my kids at home. I know Jackson well enough to know that at this time in his life his spirit can be crushed by what others might say or think about him. I’m trusting my instincts and God’s guidance to show me when the time comes that homeschooling may not be what Jackson needs. As far as Mikey, I’m not sure at this time if we’ll homeschool him or not. My guess is that we probably will at some point. Mikey and Jackson are as different as night and day. And the way I’m able to relate to them both is different too.


Many children have wonderful public/private school experiences. They thrive in ways that they simply wouldn’t have at home. Parents of kids in school should remember though that their kids are getting 40 plus hours a week of influence that they know very little about. They need to recognize when these influences are harming their kids, and they need to be willing to step in if it’s too much for their kid to handle on their own.